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How do you know it's autumn in Toronto?
The Leafs are falling.
What's the difference between the Toronto Maple Leafs and a triangle?
A triangle has 3 points.
Did you hear Toronto is getting a new area code?
048
How do you keep the Leafs off your front lawn?
Put a net on it.
What does Mike Komisarek and Timmins, Ontario have in common?
They are both Minus 25 come Christmas.
What do Vesa Toskala and Michael Jackson have in common?
They both wear one glove for apparently no reason.
What do the Leafs and a TV evangelist have in common?
They each have the ability to make 20,000 people stand up and yell "Jesus Christ!"
Where would you find the Red Light District in Toronto?
Behind the Leafs net.
What do Maple Leaf players have in common with Abe Lincoln?
They can't finish a play.
How are Maple Leaf general managers like beachcombers?
They make their living trying to salvage washed up junk.
What do you call a Toronto Maple Leaf with a Stanley Cup ring?
A thief.
Why didn't Hamilton get a hockey team?
If Hamilton got an NHL team Toronto would want one too.
What do the Toronto Maple Leafs and possums have in common?
Both play dead at home and get killed on the road.
What do you call a Maple Leafs success in 2009?
An overtime loss.
Why are the Maple Leafs like a bad bank?
No checking, no savings, and definitely no interest.
What's 2 feet wide, 30 feet long and sleeps 23 people?
The Leaf's bench.
What do the Toronto Maple Leafs, the Toronto Blue Jays, and the Toronto Raptors have in common?
None of them can play hockey.
What's the difference between the Leafs and a guy who promised his wife to quit drinking for 8 months?
The guy can look forward to a draft next summer.
The Leafs are falling.
What's the difference between the Toronto Maple Leafs and a triangle?
A triangle has 3 points.
Did you hear Toronto is getting a new area code?
048
How do you keep the Leafs off your front lawn?
Put a net on it.
What does Mike Komisarek and Timmins, Ontario have in common?
They are both Minus 25 come Christmas.
What do Vesa Toskala and Michael Jackson have in common?
They both wear one glove for apparently no reason.
What do the Leafs and a TV evangelist have in common?
They each have the ability to make 20,000 people stand up and yell "Jesus Christ!"
Where would you find the Red Light District in Toronto?
Behind the Leafs net.
What do Maple Leaf players have in common with Abe Lincoln?
They can't finish a play.
How are Maple Leaf general managers like beachcombers?
They make their living trying to salvage washed up junk.
What do you call a Toronto Maple Leaf with a Stanley Cup ring?
A thief.
Why didn't Hamilton get a hockey team?
If Hamilton got an NHL team Toronto would want one too.
What do the Toronto Maple Leafs and possums have in common?
Both play dead at home and get killed on the road.
What do you call a Maple Leafs success in 2009?
An overtime loss.
Why are the Maple Leafs like a bad bank?
No checking, no savings, and definitely no interest.
What's 2 feet wide, 30 feet long and sleeps 23 people?
The Leaf's bench.
What do the Toronto Maple Leafs, the Toronto Blue Jays, and the Toronto Raptors have in common?
None of them can play hockey.
What's the difference between the Leafs and a guy who promised his wife to quit drinking for 8 months?
The guy can look forward to a draft next summer.
If it's smoken it ain't broken
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