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A little humor.

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  • A little humor.

    A brand new store has just opened in New York City that sells Husbands.
    When women go to choose a husband, they have to follow the instructions at
    the entrance:- 'You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are 6 floors and
    the value of the products increase as you ascend the flights.
    You may choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to
    the next floor, but you CANNOT go back down except to exit the building!

    So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband.

    On the 1st floor the sign on the door reads:

    Floor 1 -
    These men have jobs.

    The 2nd floor sign reads:
    Floor 2
    - These men Have Jobs and Love Kids.


    The 3rd floor sign reads:
    Floor 3 -
    These men Have Jobs, Love Kids and are extremely good looking.


    'Wow,' she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.

    She goes to the 4th floor and the sign reads:
    Floor 4 -
    These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and Help with
    Housework.

    'Oh, mercy me!' she exclaims, 'I can hardly stand it!'

    Still, she goes to the 5th floor and sign reads:

    Floor 5 -
    These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, help with Housework
    and Have A Strong Romantic Streak. She is so tempted to stay, but she goes
    to the 6th floor and the sign reads:


    Floor 6 -
    You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor.
    This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank
    you for shopping at the Husband Store


    To avoid gender bias charges, the store's owner opens a New Wives store just
    across the street.


    The
    1st floor has wives that love sex.

    The
    2nd floor has wives that love sex and have money.


    The
    3rd through 6th floors have never been visited.

    Cheers Paul.

  • #2
    Re: A little humor.

    nice

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: A little humor.

      Blair
      Former Cars: '12 Fiat 500, '10 VW GTI, '05 Smart Fortwo, '96 VW Jetta GLX, '02 VW GTI 337.........

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: A little humor.

        hahahah here is another good one


        Why men shouldn't write advice columns:

        Dear Frank ,
        I hope you can help me here. The other day I set off for work
        leaving my husband in the house watching the TV as usual. I hadn't
        gone more than a mile down the road when my engine conked out and
        the car shuddered to a halt.

        I walked back home to get my husband's help. When I got home I
        couldn't believe my eyes. He was in the bedroom with a neighbour lady
        making mad passionate love to her. I am 32, my husband is 34 and we
        have been married for twelve years.

        When I confronted him, he tried to make out that he went into the
        back yard and heard a lady scream, had come to her rescue but found
        her unconscious He'd carried the woman back to our house, laid her
        in bed, and began CPR. When she awoke she immediately began thanking
        him and kissing him and he was attempting to break free when I came
        back. But when I asked him why neither of them had any clothes on ,
        he broke down and admitted that he'd been having an affair for the
        past six months.

        I told him to stop or I would leave him. He was let go from his job
        six months ago and he says he has been feeling increasingly
        depressed and worthless. I love him very much, but ever since I gave
        him the ultimatum he has become increasingly distant. I don't feel I
        can get through to him anymore.

        Can you please help?
        Sincerely,
        Susie Fox


        Dear Susie,
        A car stalling after being driven a short distance can be caused by
        a variety of faults. Start by checking that there is no debris in
        the fuel line. If it is clear, check the clips holding the vacuum
        lines onto the inlet manifold for air leaks. If none of these
        approaches solves the problem, it could be that the fuel pump itself
        is faulty, causing low delivery pressure to the carburettor float chamber .
        I hope this helps.

        Frank
        ________________________________

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        • #5
          Re: A little humor.

          Both of those jokes were pretty funny.
          2002 996TT
          2011 S5
          2004 S4 Avant

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          • #6
            Re: A little humor.

            Hahahhaa...those two were good
            Matt - A3

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            • #7
              Re: A little humor.

              Good ones.. Here's another..

              Sven and Olaf worked together in a Minnesota
              factory....and both were laid off. So...dey went
              to the Unemployment Office together.

              Asked his occupation, Olaf said, 'Panty stitcher.
              I sew da elastic onto da ladies cotton panties.'
              The clerk looked up panty stitcher. Finding it
              classified as unskilled labor, she gave Olaf $300
              a week in unemployment compensation.
              Sven, when asked his occupation replied,
              'Diesel fitter.'
              The clerk looked up diesel fitter...and it was
              classified as a skilled job. So, the clerk gave
              Sven $600 a week in unemployment compensation.
              When Olaf found this out, he was furious ! He
              stormed back into the office to find out why
              his friend and co-worker was collecting double
              his benefits.

              The clerk explained, 'Panty stitchers are
              unskilled labor and diesel fitters are skilled labor.'
              'Vat skill?' yelled Olaf. 'I sew da elastic on da
              panties. Olaf puts dem over his head and says,
              'Yah...... DIESEL FITTER.'

              Like Type 2's? Visit my blog!

              My posts and comments written here on this forum are on my spare time and are my personal opinion(s) and are not the opinion(s) or policy of my employer nor are they proven to be accurate. Use advice at your own risk.
              You dig sucka?!

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: A little humor.

                hahaha I just found this thread so I thought i'd continue it!

                The husband had just finished reading a new book entitled, 'You Can Be the Man of Your House.'

                He stormed to his wife in the kitchen and announced, 'From now on, you need to know that I am the man o f this house and my word is law. You will prepare me a gourmet meal tonight, and when I'm finished eating my meal, you will serve me a sumptuous dessert. After dinner, you are going to go upstairs with me and we will have the kind of sex that I want. Afterwards, you are going to draw me a bath so I can relax. You will wash my back and towel me dry and bring me my robe. Then, you will massage my feet and hands.

                Then tomorrow, guess who's going to dress me and comb my hair?

                The wife replied, 'The f***in' funeral director would be my first guess.
                Patryk
                Instagram: @parkus08

                91 BMW 340is ///M-Tech II - Under construction
                08 VW .:R32
                04 Audi A4 Avant 1.8TQ

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